Never forget the following
Say thank you.
Do not hesitate to say sorry.
Be grateful.
Be forgiving.
Never hesitate to admire others for their work.
Be positive in your attitude.
Have faith in the Higher Power.
Decisions
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Are our decisions voluntary or involuntary? Are we deciding or are decisions being made? You seem to take decisions after giving a lot of thought, but if you will notice the decisions are taken randomly at the final step. Are there any right or wrong decisions? Are events good or bad? Life seems to proceed along paths that are randomly taken and we categorize them as good and bad. We have absolutely no control over the events, our decisions or any other aspect of our life. If our birth and death are not under our control why do we think that events between those two major events of any one’s life are under our control. If we accept this, we can have great peace.
Dancing leaves
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As I was driving to work this morning, I saw a lovely dance of yellow and brown dry leaves on the edge of the road. As the cars moved by, they were jumping, falling over each other, twisting, spinning and making many more exotic moves. It was amazing and so peaceful to watch the dance. I felt this was nature's way of celebrating life and death.
More or less
Listen more, Talk less
Walk more, eat less
Smile more, frown less
Give more, take less
Enjoy more, brood less
Be content more, want less
Do more unitasking, less multitasking
Have more compassion, less hatred
Have more joy, worry less
Be more in the present, less in the past and in the future
Develop feeling of more U, less I
With this more or less, happiness is all yours
Wastage
As I was walking along the corridor I found a notice which said “Do not waste paper” and under the notice was a bunch of papers with various advertisements for different products, housing projects, health foods etc. I stood there for sometime perplexed with the sight which pushed me into the fundamental question as to what is “wastage”?
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Here are some random thoughts that came to my mind:
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Paper
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Are huge advertisements in newspapers wastage of paper? Incidentally I calculated and found that more than 80% of the magazine section of a recent news paper was advertisements only!
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Is it wastage making origami designs with paper?
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Magazines printed in expensive paper full of color and gloss; is it wastage of paper and resources of the planet?
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How about printouts of articles from journals which someone takes for reading?
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Practicing handwriting every day; is it wastage of paper?
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Time
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Sitting quietly and relaxing or meditating; is it wastage of time?
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Reading a story book or some non-fiction book; is it wastage of time?
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Playing games with your children, friends; is it wastage of time?
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Spending extended periods of time to excel in writing an article or a book; is it wastage of time?
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Learning an art such as music, dance, painting, etc.; is it a wastage of time?
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Money
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Living farther from place of work for other personal reasons and driving back and forth everyday; is it wastage of money, fuel and time?
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Taking a long drive in the countryside for fun; is it wastage of money, fuel and time?
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Eating well and doing exercise to keep the body healthy; it is wastage of money, food and time?
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Spending money for watching a movie, theatre, or any other form of entertainment; is it wastage of money?
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Talking to your friends over phone; is it wastage of time and money?
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Taking photographs or selfies and uploading them in the internet; is this wastage of time, energy?
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Is watering plants in the garden wastage of water even when there is no shortage of water?
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Am I wasting my time in expressing myself? I better stop wasting my time.
Positive driving
Driving in Delhi is supposed to be maddening; it all depends on the perspective. Having to drive everyday more than 50 kilometers each way from home to work and back everyday pushed me into thinking more about driving and how I can benefit from the long drives through the maze of traffic, the noise, the chaos, the vehicles in all forms and speeds coming and going in both directions on the road.
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The first thing I realized soon was due to sufficient experience in driving, it is more sub conscious driving rather than being conscious of it. It is something like walking or running when you do not plan and take steps; your sub conscious does the job for you. The sub conscious is great, it takes care of our movements and keeps us most of the times out of trouble. In fact the moment one becomes conscious of what one is doing one is prone to make mistakes. So let the subliminal take care of us.
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As with every aspect of life, driving can also help us in the path of philosophy. Here are some random thoughts that I have been having as I drive along the road.
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Right lane-middle lane-left lane on the left side of the road
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Which lane does one drive in; right lane versus middle lane versus left lane? As we drive we clearly see the plus and minuses of the three lanes.
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Right lane: Fastest lane in India but remember there may sometimes be broken down vehicles, parked cars with drivers talking on the mobile or even cows grazing on the grass that has grown on the divider. The problem becomes acute especially at bends when the occupation of the lane is not visible. At the same time, overtaking vehicles have only one choice, to overtake you from your left. That makes it a better choice as we need to worry only about one side of our driving.
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Left lane: Slowest lane in India but remember again that there may be parked vehicles, broken down vehicles, very slow vehicles such as tractors, animal drawn vehicles etc. Also we must remember that the left lane has a higher probability of objects such as nails, broken glass, etc. which may cause damage to the vehicle. Sometimes the road conditions on this lane are also not that good. As to overtaking vehicles you have only your right side to worry about.
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What about the middle path, the middle lane. Seems to be the best choice in terms of speed and driving pleasure. The only problem is we have to live with vehicles overtaking us from both right and left and that needs utmost care. Also the probability of the middle lane being blocked is rather small and hence perhaps the safest.
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Pot holes and memory
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There are roads with pot holes and pot holes with roads! Pot holes on the roads come in various sizes and depths and sometimes there is a single pot hole or a group of pot holes who form a family of pot holes. Some are deep and narrow while others are broad and not too deep. Of course there are also pot holes which are deep and broad which is more like a ditch. So when we drive on the roads it is important to keep track of the pot holes on the route. Some pot holes are permanent features on the route while some appear and disappear. These pot holes help us in improving our memory as we need to remember and recall the positions and dimensions of these pot holes as we drive along the path. This is also a subliminal effect as our sub conscious mind takes control of our driving to avoid many of these old pot holes which are a part of our memory. Some of the pot holes appear in combinations which require us to improve our driving skills so that we can position ourselves around the individual pot holes to save the car’s shock absorbers and also avoid the next one as we approach it.
Lane driving versus line driving
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Traffic is supposed to follow lane driving and it is expected that vehicles indicate any changes in the lane before embarking on lane changes. You may have noticed that many drivers follow line driving instead of lane driving. They ensure that their vehicle is perfectly centred on the line and so occupy two adjacent lanes. They are adept at this skill and follow it very strictly as they drive along giving little thoughts on its impact on the traffic on the road.
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Learning psychology while driving
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As we drive along we find different types of drivers; some who are happy driving at a good constant speed, some who zig-zag along cutting through the traffic, some who cannot wait to honk constantly whether required or not and checking intermittently if by any chance the horn has broken down, some who are lost in thoughts and drive at a constant slow speed which is usually the fastest lane, and some who are on their mobile even typing Whatsapp messages or viewing youtube, etc. The way of driving can give us a lot of information about the driver.
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The confident drivers hardly need to honk; they can anticipate very well the traffic as it flows along and adjust their vehicle’s speed and position automatically without having to warn the others. Theyare also the calm people who are almost in control of their lives. They do not get agitated when another vehicle overtakes them or cuts across them. They have a smile on their face and wonder what this hurry is all about, saving a minute or two so that the same people can waste an hour gossiping! We can be quick but need not hurry.
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Then there are those who keep honking and who do not wish to even waste a few seconds to overtake the cars in front. They are under stress and always in a hurry to reach the destination even at the cost of putting their and other’s lives in danger. They think all others are driving too slowly and that they have more important things to do. Intermittent honking is an indication of lack of confidence in driving and shows that they are unable to weave through the traffic keeping others’interests also in mind. It also indicates that the driver is perhaps under stress and looks at the world to be shouted at rather than understood.
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There are the slow drivers who seem to have no cares in the world or have left too early for their destination. They are also least concerned about the jam that they may be causing due to their driving habits. But who cares!
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There are some who cannot take their eyes off their mobiles even while driving oblivious to the danger to themselves and the others on the road. They seem to suffer from FOMO (Fear of Missing Out).
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On the whole it is a real life video game of driving, manoeuvring, avoiding stationary and moving targets, animate and inanimate objects, and keeping calm not allowing the blood pressure to riseand keeping a smile on one’s face! At many places it is a battle of nerves!
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Right and left
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In some countries the traffic keeps to the left while in some other countries it keeps to the right. In some places in our country right and left are right sorry left! Some people think that even the right lane of the road has a right and a left and so they can drive on the left of the right lane or on the right of the left lane. So you have fractal system where the main road has a left and a right lane.
Then both the right and left lanes have their own right and left which in turn have their right and left and so on. So here is advanced mathematics for the traffic. In all this when one is driving one does not know whether one should be driving on the left of the left lane or the right of the left lane .... At these times indicators or flashing lights of what normally we will conclude as wrong direction driving comes to help. This way the person driving on the right (correct) lane indicates to the person driving on his wrong lane his/her intention and hopefully avoids a direct confrontation with the incoming traffic.
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Music on the move
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Listening to music while driving is enjoyable. Of course one has to be careful in the choice of music. Some music has a calming effect while others may make one more aggressive. I have realised that the calming music can actually increase one’s sense of compassion to others on the road. One starts to feel for the hurrying cars, the honking cars, the zig-zagging cars etc. May be the drivers have perhaps had a bad beginning of the day or the day has been stressful for them. In either case one feels for them and wishes that tomorrow will be better for them and that the honking does not continue into shouting on reaching home or office.
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Driving on Delhi and roads in the National Capital Region provide us with opportunities to improve our memory, make us more aware and attentive, improve our reaction times and makes us more philosophical for which we must be grateful. All these will keep us young in mind. It is all finally a perspective.
Umbrella
Morning was well spent in committee meetings with some extraordinary people. All soft spoken, willing to hear to the other with open minds, not interrupting between conversations and expressing a desire to help in taking appropriate decisions. There were coffee breaks with some nice coffee and snacks. Lunch was good with discussions on vegetarian foods. From a question as to whether the salad had fish in it, the conversation went into the fact that some people consider fish to be a part of vegetarian dish. It seems that vegetarianism is turning more and more popular in the West especially among the younger generation.
Being the last day in the town, I walked around the shops and other historic places and looking for interesting and useful stuff to take home. With increasing globalization, similar shops have cropped up all across the major cities in the world and also selling the same items. There was not that much of attraction in the shops except to look for some unusual items. There were people hurrying to go home, to go for dinner, people sitting in the benches talking animatedly, young people jogging, senior citizens walking at their own pace and crossing the road knowing full well that the traffic will stop for them, how nice. Life seemed to go on.
I was feeling hungry and located Domino’s Pizza restaurant close to the hotel. After walking for more than four hours during the day, the feet were heavy, and I wanted to sit and enjoy the meal. Ordered a small Pizza and sat down hanging my backpack on the chair. For about ten minutes I spent looking out of the window and seeing the expressions in the faces of people hurrying or walking listening to music close to their ears. The pizza arrived fresh from the oven, hot and crisp. The first bite almost burned my tongue and so I waited for the pizza to cool down a bit. Enjoyed the pizza and walked back to my hotel room. Changed my clothes for the night and decided to relax, reading a book.
Prepared hot coffee and enjoyed every sip of the drink and started to pack my bags for my departure the following day. As I was packing, I suddenly realized that my small and light foldable black umbrella was missing. I searched around the hotel room, including between the beds, in the cupboard and every other possible place but could not find the umbrella. I checked inside the bag, inside my suitcase thinking perhaps I have put it already in the suitcase but could not find it. This umbrella has been with me for many years and the thought of losing it made me a bit sad. My thoughts went back to many occasions when I carried the umbrella in my pant pocket and walked around without feeling in the least the weight of the umbrella. The umbrella had served me many years and I took it whenever I went on trips away from home.
As I was searching for the umbrella, I remembered many conversations with my wife as to the philosophical outlook that “whatever belongs to you, can never be taken away from you and whatever is not yours will leave you.” I have seen the impact of this philosophical thought during many events in my life and firmly believed in this. As I was thinking about the umbrella, this thought immediately eased my feelings and I thought “if the umbrella is mine, I will be able to find it; otherwise it is not mine and so got lost”. With this thought I dressed up again and went out looking for the umbrella.
The first stop was the shop which I had entered after having my pizza while returning to the hotel. The lady at the counter looked at me and I said “Did I leave an umbrella here?”. She thought that I was wanting to buy an umbrella and hence showed me the umbrellas kept in the shop. I had to clarify that I was looking for my small umbrella that I may have dropped in the shop and she shrugged her shoulders and said “I am sorry. I do not know”. I thought to myself, there it is, perhaps the umbrella is not mine after all.
Then I went to Domino’s Pizza restaurant. As I entered there were some customers at the counter and also some customers sitting and waiting for their pizza. There was no one at the counter. Then I walked straight to the seat that I was occupying and lo and behold there was my umbrella cosily sitting under the chair next to where I was sitting. I was overwhelmed with joy at the sight of my umbrella and said to myself, “Oh yes, the umbrella is still mine and so I could get it back.” It occurred to me that the umbrella must have fallen when I had hung the backpack on the chair and I did not notice that my bag weighed less when I left the restaurant. I immediately picked up the umbrella and told the person at the counter that I had found the umbrella that I had accidentally dropped in the shop. He smiled at me and made no comments.
I walked back to the hotel with the nice thoughts that I passed successfully through this real test of the reactions of the mind when events that in our opinion are not good happen.
Reading, lecturing and thinking about the philosophy of life is not sufficient. One may know all mantras by heart, be able to recite any number of shlokas, but the actual test is when you are placed in a tough situation, are you able to practice all the philosophy that you have been lecturing about? At the instant when unforeseen events happen, can you become aware of the philosophy of what is life all about and be peaceful? Events are opportunities for all of us to practice and learn to be peaceful internally. No power can take away what is ours and no matter what we do we if it is not ours no effort of ours can keep it with us. This is the truth. Not getting elated at success and not getting frustrated at failures is a mark of wisdom and zen practice.